I'm wondering why I want to share this.

In part, it's because of multiple conversations I've had this week about busy women doing more. It's also because I wrestled in taking a break from my studies but eventually got to the point that I knew I had to for my wellbeing. Perhaps someone will read this and it will resonate.

I took a break from my studies for a little while towards the end of 2025. It was my second and final one I'm permitted on my course. Both were stress related but for different reasons. My working pattern is sometimes unhealthy. I'm constantly navigating fulfilling purpose and remembering to check in with myself. As an internal PDAer (someone with pervasive drive for autonomy) I am I own to resist even low level demands, even when they're things that I want for myself) checking in can put me at war with myself for days! 

I had been struggling for a while, gotten overwhelmed. Not with the studies but with everything around the studies. Life was throwing curveballs for a solid few months. In all, it was six months of ups and downs, juggling and pressure. Some was of my making but some wasn't. Eventually, the studies were the only thing that could give. There was no free corner in my brain for it. And there was no time in the diary. I know we all say we haven't got time but genuinely, none.

Studying while working can be like that. I've studied whilst working full time for over 25 years now - yes that's how much I love learning. And for much of that I was raising a family too. There are ebbs and flows. There has to be. Life isn't static and when something comes along, the reality is we have to be prepared to make a choice of what gives. It's not a failing. That's my takeaway from this.

My research supervisors were great, even encouraging me to take longer than I actually asked for but first checking that I really wanted to do this. I knew I had no choice from a wellbeing perspective but I also knew, as a person who can make work for herself in an empty room, that if I gave myself toouch space, I'd fill the time with something else. I stuck to my guns that I'd be back at the beginning of January.